"Let your faith be bigger than your fear!"

This was me teaching last year!

I have officially been back in Provo for a month and boy has my life changed A LOT! I thought I new the direction that my life was going. I thought that I would have a fun and easy semester. I thought things were going to go perfectly and that everything would just fall into place. Well, lets just say I thought a lot of things, and was wrong about every single one of them! 

This semester was going to be a breeze! WRONG!! I thought my 14 credits (the smallest amount I have ever taken) and the classes only on Tuesday and Thursday would be amazing. Well along with those 14 credits I also have my job as a facilitator! I work on Tuesdays and Thursdays after classes and in-between classes. I am now also FINALLY (after many emails and confusion) in an elementary school doing my 75 hours to finish my TESOL minor! This great lady in my ward, Beth Borup, is letting me be in her 1st grade class! Today was my first day and I just loved it! It really reminded me why I wanted to be a teacher (which I needed because I was starting to doubt myself).

Lately I have been trying to decide which direction I want my life to go. I had it all planned out, but you know how well that goes. You know what you want and then nothing works out. Or you get what you want and you figure out that isn't what you wanted in the first place. Those both have happened to me. There have been a lot of sleepless nights and a lot of intense conversations with some of my friends. I am sure that they are all sick of hearing about it, but they really help me a lot. I don't know what I would do without them.

I have also been thinking about my friends a lot lately. A lot of them have gotten married recently and A lot of them will be graduating and moving on to bigger and better things come April. I should be with, but I made the terrible sacrifice of pushing graduation back in order to go to New Zealand (how terrible, haha). I have been trying to spend as much time as I can with these friends because who knows if we will ever see each other again, which makes me super sad. There are also my AMAZING friends that will still be here when I get back to New Zealand. Even though they aren't too happy about it, I AM! I am glad that I will still have people that I will know when I get back and that I can still talk to and have fun with! I have some GREAT friends and I seriously love them to death!

Last weekend was the Relief Society General Broadcast. Okay, I will admit right now, I didn't pay attention to all of it. I was sick and was so out of it and in a bad mood. I did listen to all of President Uchtdorfs talk! It was amazing and I feel that it was directed to me. It was definitely something that I needed to hear and things I need to work on. He talked about the 5 Forget Not's. Here they are and here is the link if you want to read about them! "Forget Not"

1. Forget Not to be Patient with Yourself
2. Forget Not the Difference Between a Good Sacrifice and a Foolish Sacrifice
3. Forget Not to be Happy Now
4. Forget Not the Why of the Gospel
5. Forget Not that the Lord Loves You

One last thing to add to this boring and rather lengthy blog post. When I left Wyoming I wrote a list of goals that I wanted to accomplish during the semester. One of them was to be more social. Well, I believe that I have forgotten that goal. I got back to Provo and I decided that I didn't need to get to know people because I was leaving in January and there was no reason too. I need to be more outgoing and break out of my shell. When I am with my good friends I am a completely different Emily than I am when I am with other people. This needs to change. I need to show my true colors to everyone. That is what I am going to work on this week and for the rest of the semester. WISH ME LUCK! I'm gonna need it!

P.S. 97 days until I leave for New Zealand! AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!